Friday, 22 March 2013

Nerf War Part 1

Beans Moment (Energy)
WALT choose words that describe a moment for the reader

  • begin in the action
  • present tense (I am, not I was)
  • short, sharp sentences
  • uses the senses (smell, taste, look, hear, touch)
  • strong verbs

I have beans in a Nerf war with my friends.

“I’ll have the shoty” (shotgun) My friend Mack says “Me too” “Ok. Move out!” I sprint around the corner yelling out ‘YELELELELELA!” But no one was there, not even a wombat. Mainly because there are no wombats in New Zealand. I was so embarrassed, my face went as red as a ripe apple. I signal the others to move out. I have to keep it down I think to myself.

All of a sudden a big wave of enemies come hurdling our way. TAKE COVER! I feel myself grip the handle of the shoty. I pull the trigger. I can’t believe it! I hit someone. I look over at the huge group of enemies. He shouts out “HIT!” It was joyous. The noise was unbearable. All it was was just screaming and shouting.
I still can’t believe I survived that ferocious attack.
I felt very relieved I wasn’t out of the game. But there was one problem one BIG! problem. I was the last survivor on my team. I decide to move out ...again... But just befor I go around the corner I hear a game plan.
It can’t be my team. It has to be the other team. I can catch them off guard. POT SHOT! I missed. “Under attack!” I hear around the corner. “Where did it come from?” I decide to make a plan. Somewhere safe.

This is my beans moment. The class had to create story based on the great book beans by P. Grace.

Scan my QR Code for my favourite part!


  1. Awesome writing, Zeb!

    You really make the moment come alive for the reader. Love how you included a QR code of your favourite part.

  2. Hey Zeb I like your post. Did you win the war?

  3. I like your Beans moment Zeb and how many guns did you have? That is a really like your story because I can imagine being there, well done Zeb and keep up the good work!!


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